Bride and groom smiling at alter with green and white arch behind them

Wedding Vows for Him: Examples and Ideas

Dec 16, 2019
By Wedding Spot

Want to write wedding vows that will make your significant other smile, laugh, or cry tears of joy? When it comes to wedding vows for him, most experts say to write from the heart. And while that’s certainly true, there are some practical techniques that will make expressing yourself a lot easier. In this article, we’ll cover some great methods and tips for writing your wedding vows to get you started! 

How do you write your own vows?

Putting your deepest feelings of love and appreciation down on paper is a challenging task, even if you’ve already done it before. It requires you to be introspective and vulnerable. And no matter how much you love someone, it might be hard to put those feelings into words. The good news is, it’s a very normal problem to have. This is why we recommend using examples, exercises, and templates (like the ones in this article) to help shape your wedding vows. 

To start, think about how you want to affect your partner. For example, would they appreciate a tear-jerking memory from your early courtship days? Or would they prefer to laugh about a particularly silly moment you recently shared? You know them best so trust your instincts and go from there. 

Once you have a draft written, step away from it for a day or two. Then, return with fresh eyes. Read it out loud once or twice and edit as needed. If you’re really feeling stuck, ask a close friend who knows you both fairly well to go over it with you. 

What should I include in my wedding vows?

Aside from certain religious traditions, there are no real rules for what you can or cannot include in your wedding vows. In general, though, most winning vows will focus on the other person, give some examples of why you love them so much, and list the promises you would like to make for your future relationship. 

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How long should vows be?

Although your wedding vows are your opportunity to formally express your love and commitment to your partner in front of your closest friends and family, they don’t have to be show-stopping. In fact, short and sweet will always be better than overstaying your welcome. A general rule of thumb is to keep your wedding vows to three short paragraphs, which should amount to one minute when you speak them aloud. This length allows you to express yourself fully without making your audience too antsy. 

Who goes first in wedding vows?

You can do them at the same time (if you’re promising the same vows to one another). Or, you can even flip the order if one person would strongly prefer to go first for any particular reason. It’s really up to you and your partner! 

What are some things to consider when writing wedding vows? 

No matter what kind of ceremony you have planned, these three major areas should cover all of your bases. 

  • Religion and Spirituality. If either of these factor into your relationship, you should include an appropriate quote, text, or tradition into your wedding vows. 

  • Family and Friends. Think about your audience when writing your wedding vows. This is not the time for elaborate inside jokes (a one-liner is okay), raunchy anecdotes, or language that might offend anyone. 

  • Your Partner’s Preferences. Although the words you plan to say will be a surprise, you can absolutely discuss the wedding vows with your partner. Go over the length, format, and general style with one another ahead of time to make sure you’re on the same page. 

Brainstorming exercises for wedding vows

These basics are actually quite fruitful. You’ll come up with a lot of different vow ideas just from thinking about these subjects. 

  1. Favorite Memories. Write the short story of how you met, your first date, your first kiss, and the moment you knew you wanted to marry them. Any of these moments can be referenced in your vows. 

  2. Things You Both Love. Maybe you share a love of dogs or have the same hobbies. Whatever you bond over can be used in your wedding vows if it’s a foundational part of your relationship. 

  3. Things You Both Value. Your religion, morals, and shared ethics help keep your union strong and building values around those principles will only make it stronger. 

  4. What Makes Them Unique. What makes your future spouse so very special? Now’s a good time to highlight those qualities while acknowledging what you plan to do to keep them happy. 

An easy wedding vows for him template

You can’t go wrong if you use this formula. 

  • Acknowledge your union by saying that you take your partner to be your lawfully wedded spouse. 

  • Say a sentence or two about what marriage means to you. Quotes from your favorite poems, scriptures, or even movies work well here if you don’t quite know how to phrase it yourself. 

  • Talk about one or two extremely special moments in your relationship. They don’t have to be the all-time highs and lows, so take the pressure off of yourself here. Just reference your favorites. 

  • Tell your partner why you love them. Focus on their personality, character, and accomplishments and limit yourself to a maximum of 5 major things. 

  • Make your relationship promises. This can be anything from making sure you’ll always pick up your dirty socks to caring for them on their lowest days. Choose promises that mean something to your partner. 

  • End with “I love you”. 

Ways to make your wedding vows funny

Now it’s time to add a little personality back into the mix! 

  1. Reference an embarrassing moment you both shared. Just make sure you focus on something that they feel positively about. If you’re unsure, you can always run this small part by them ahead of time. 

  2. Mention a quirky habit of theirs that everyone knows about. Are they a die-hard socks with sandals fan or known for being extremely stubborn when losing board games? Referencing this quality will bring a smile to the faces of their loved ones who are in on their lovable (or at least tolerable) quirk. As long as your partner is not super sensitive about it, it’s fair game. 

  3. Poke fun at yourself. If you’re highly aware of what others might judge about your relationship (she’s way younger, he’s way shorter, you’re both major Star Wars nerds, etc.) acknowledge it by making it a joke in your vows! You know your relationship is amazing and publicly owning your unique situation in a light-hearted manner puts even the most disapproving attendees at ease. 

Ways to make your wedding vows sad 

If you prefer sentiment over laughs, try these on for size. 

  1. Focus on how they make you feel. This can be day to day or when they do certain things or when they are just being themselves. But centering your vows around feeling words instead of logical ones is an easy way to make your speech more vulnerable and authentic. 

  2. Acknowledge all of them. No one is perfect and to be loved for being yourself, flaws and all, is a truly beautiful thing. Thank them for accepting yours and let them know you love them for all their characteristics, not in spite of a few. 

  3. Pick a moment where they made a tough decision, showed strength, or inspired you. Talk about what they did, why you admire them for it, and what it means for your shared union. This one works especially well if you haven’t previously acknowledged this event before in the same context - the surprise will touch them. 

You’re almost ready for the big day! 

Here are ideas for wedding vows for her, as well as some ways to get comfortable for all the photos you will have to be in!

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Wedding Spot

The Wedding Spot blog is designed to help couples navigate every step of the wedding planning journey. From before the engagement to after you say “I do,” our goal is to give you the tips, ideas, and inspiration to prepare for your big day — and all that comes with it.