bride reading wedding vows for her

Wedding Vows for Her: Examples and Ideas

Feb 5, 2020
By Wedding Spot

Expressing your love for your partner in thoughtful, funny, or heartwarming ways can be a challenge. Luckily we’ve got you covered with some great tips and tricks when it comes to wedding vows for her. But first, here’s a closer look at what wedding vows really are and why we do them, as well as some answers to your most burning questions. 

Explore everything you need to know about wedding vows for her:

Although wedding vows are used across most religions and cultures, the earliest recorded instances in an official ceremony date all the way back to Medieval England. However, many scholars argue that they were already a fairly widespread tradition by the time they were written about in texts. Although they were used for both religious and nonreligious ceremonies, at the time it was used by the wife to vow her devotion to her husband. Today, both partners typically say vows to each other during their wedding. 

Why are wedding vows important? 

Like most wedding traditions, wedding vows are symbolic. Whether or not you use them as a public declaration of undying devotion, they’re a beautiful way to share your love for your partner in front of your closest friends and family. You can use traditional vows from your religion, pre-written vows, or you can come up with your own. 

How do you write your own vows?

There are three main ways to go about it: start from scratch, use a template, or customize pre-written ones. If you’re starting from scratch, we have some great ideas for both funny and sad vows below. There are lots of ways to go about it but the simplest way to begin is to decide how you’d like to make your partner feel, then go from here. 

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What should I include in my vows?

A great formula is to reference a special memory, explain why that memory is important to you both, as well as how it makes you feel about them. Then, follow it up with promises you have for your union (both serious and silly ones are great). 

How long should vows be?

They’re typically less than 5 minutes each. You can write as little as 2 paragraphs or as much as 2 pages. Also, you and your partner should agree on the approximate length you’ll both use. That way your ceremony will be more balanced and no one is taken by surprise. 

Who goes first in wedding vows?

Traditionally the groom (if there is one) goes first but you and your partner can decide what feels right for you both. 

Why do some couples skip wedding vows? 

One or both partners may feel uncomfortable with public speaking. Or they opt to recite letters on camera for their videographer to enjoy as part of their wedding film later. It’s a personal choice really. If the thought of saying vows makes either of you squirm, you can always use some traditional ones or write a line or two for you to say at the same time. 

Traditional vs. modern vs. personalized vows

Traditional vows refer to any vows associated with religious traditions. Modern vows usually spin-off from the religious ones and have similar sentiments even though they’re widely used by spiritual and agnostic folks alike. Personalized vows can include any combination of traditional or modern vows and original writing. 

3 ways to write funny wedding vows for her: 

  1. Reference a chore. One of the more amusing ideas is to joke about something your partner has to do because of or for you. It can be anything from unclogging hair from the drain to snuggling you even when you’re grumpy. Vow that you’ll always make them do it. 

  2. Shine a spotlight on your differences. This one works especially well if you have some obvious things to choose from, whether that be a profession, age, race, height, etc. Commenting on it in a funny way will make your partner and your wedding guests smile. 

  3. Acknowledge your imperfections. We all have some things that make us difficult to live with at times so why not throw in a couple of things that they have to put up with forever? Plus, a little self-deprecating humor is fun when your family is in on the joke too. 

3 ways to write sad wedding vows for her:

  1. Honor those who cannot be with you today. Loved ones who have passed on will be with you, always, and acknowledging them during your vows (as your and your partner become one family) can sometimes be really sweet. Just make sure your partner is okay with it - if it’s a recent loss they might not want to get overwhelmed by the memory of this person or pet during the ceremony. 

  2. Reference a challenge they overcame. You’ve seen your partner through good times and bad by now. Publicly acknowledging their strengths and character using a specific example you witnessed will make them feel appreciated. 

  3. Talk about who you are before and after meeting them. How did their presence in your life change you? It’s a big question but your answer might be surprisingly simple. Knowing how they’ve touched your life will surely warm their heart. 

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Wedding Spot

The Wedding Spot blog is designed to help couples navigate every step of the wedding planning journey. From before the engagement to after you say “I do,” our goal is to give you the tips, ideas, and inspiration to prepare for your big day — and all that comes with it.